Thursday, August 27, 2015

So I did a thing...

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I quit my job this week.

Such a simple statement to describe a decision that was anything but.

I always assumed that I would work.  For a long time, I didn't think I'd ever have kids, and I was okay with that.  I'm a firm believer in making your own happiness and not depending on others to give your life meaning and fulfillment.  But as I got older, the idea of children wasn't quite so... scary. Still, I figured if I ever did have kids, I would be a working mom.  After all, I invested quite a lot of time and effort in my education and I wanted to put it to good use.

Even after I got pregnant and was surfing the tsunami of hormones, I knew I would continue to teach after my maternity leave was up.  I am, after all, a Modern Woman, and I wanted my daughter to see that it is possible to work and have a family.  Countless women before me had fought hard for the progress I now enjoy, and it's my responsibility to keep pushing forward so that Little Roo can inherit a better world, one where women aren't dismissed and discounted on the basis of their gender.

And then I gave birth.

Little Roo has been a revelation.  Before, she was this abstract idea and I had no trouble imagining how I would fit her into the 'baby' slot in my life.  She would simply be an addition, much like the attic addition to our house.  We would adjust, but life would go on much as before.

Let me pause here so that the parents reading this can finish laughing.

Naive doesn't even begin to describe my pre-parent thinking, but that's okay.  I don't think there really is a way to imagine just how much life changes after your baby is born.  Needless to say, Little Roo has completely transformed my life.  The best way to describe it is a metamorphosis--going from caterpillar to butterfly.  It's a one-way street, and you can never go back to not being a parent.

Not that I want to.

Anyway, the more I get to know this amazing little human, the more my work life faded in importance.  Never in a million years did I think I would *want* to stay home with a drooling, non-verbal, incontinent creature, and yet I can't bear to be apart from her.  I figured I would be counting down the days until I got to go back to work, but I found myself counting down the days until I would have to go back to work.  The thought of leaving her broke my heart, and I'm just not strong enough to do it,

So after much discussion, Mister and I decided that I won't.

It's going to be a big change for us, that's for sure.  And the decision has been a little bittersweet, because I truly did love my teaching job.  I worked with some amazing people, and I am going to miss seeing them every day.

But in the end, I know we made the right choice for our family.  And in addition to taking care of Little Roo, I'm also going to be able to call myself a full-time writer for the first time in my life.  Scary?  Yes.  But also exhilarating.

My daughter will still learn that it is possible to work and have a family--I've come to realize I don't have to leave the house to show her that.  And I know I will still be teaching, even if I never set foot in another classroom again.

My life has changed direction (again!) but I'm not disappointed.  On the contrary, it's exciting, this new road we've chosen.  

I can't wait to see where it takes us.

If you've been reading my blog, you know that Fridays are reserved for a post where I celebrate the little things that have happened during the week. This is a blog hop created by Vikki and now hosted by Lexa Cain, and it's one of my favorite blogging things to do.  I encourage you to check out her blog and the full list of participants, because who doesn't love reading about good things?

39 comments:

  1. Congratulations, Lara. I made the same difficult decision a gazillion years ago, and I have absolutely no regrets. Enjoy. <3

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    1. Thanks, Deb! It's going to be an adjustment, but things have already started to change for the better :)

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  2. Aww, that's lovely! And you're right, you *will* be working - just at writing instead of teaching outside the home. We have a one parent works/one stays home arrangement too, and I can't imagine it any other way -- I see kids on the bus or the tram with their nannies and babysitters and it seems sad. Lucky those who can stay home, I say!

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    1. Absolutely--I know I'm so lucky to get to do this!

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  3. nice
    http://melodyjacob1.blogspot.com/2015/07/a-pop-of-colour.html

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  4. Hi Lara!
    I know that I haven't been around in quite a while. Just trying to play catch-up...
    I had a good chuckle at your comment: "She would simply be an addition, much like the attic addition to our house. We would adjust, but life would go on much as before." LOL

    Congrats on the new road you've chosen... enjoy the ride!
    At least you get to be a "full-time" author... a position lots of writers only dream about.

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    1. Hi Michelle--good to 'see' you again!

      I definitely had no clue what life would be like after baby. Fortunately, I'm happy with the changes! :)

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  5. Congrats! If I could do anything in the world, it would be becoming a stay-at-home mom. Perhaps some day! Enjoy your Little Roo (so cute!)

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    1. I will keep my fingers crossed for you! Thanks for stopping by! :)

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  6. Such an awesome decision, and one you'll never ever regret! I'm sure you will continue to teach. Enjoy your little one, they don't stay little long and you don't want to miss a minute of it! You did the right thing for you, for her, for the future!

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    1. In the end, that's what swayed me--the fact that this time will pass so fast. :)

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  7. Wow! Lara, I'm not the one to ask about this, since I was never blessed to be a mother. But, I love you made the decision for *you and your family*, not for anyone else. Go, Lara, Go!

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    1. Thanks, Zan Marie! I appreciate it! :)

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  8. Went through the same process eighteen years ago and came to the same decision. I've never regretted it! Enjoy your time with Roo--each day will never come again and you never know what she'll learn or discover or achieve. It's a gift.

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    1. Very true--I can't wait to watch her learn and grow!

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  9. Congratulations on making such a big decision. I wish I had been able to stay home with my kids longer when they were babies, but since I'm the breadwinner in the family, that was never an option. Enjoy it, but if it stops being fun, go back to work.

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    1. Absolutely! I'm so lucky we are in the position to have this be an option :)

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  10. Congratulations on following your heart. I know from experience that can be scary. You're right that you'll still be able to be a true example of a working mom as a writer. I'm not going to lie, it's not an easy path, but is there such a thing as an easy path? Certainly not one worth taking. Sending much love and support your way...

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    1. Thank you, Melissa! I so appreciated hearing how you and your family made it work--you're one of my inspirations! :)

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  11. This is great news for me, a big Lara Lacombe fan -- if something had to drop, I'm glad it was dumb old teaching (I kid! I know you are a fantastic teacher!!) and not book writing!!! Huge congrats to you!!!

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  12. Congratulations! Our priorities change as our lives change, and I'm excited for this next adventure in your life! Yay!!!

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  13. Wow, that is a very big decision. Thanks for explaining how you reached it for the benefit of those who've never been in your position. Best wishes on your new career as a full time writer! Have a lovely weekend!

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    1. Thanks, Lexa! I hope you had a good weekend too! :)

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  14. Doesn't sound like an easy decision, but with the way you're reacting, I think you'll be fine. Good luck.

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  15. Lara, you sound exactly like myself many years ago. My hubby & I don't regret that decision one bit. You learn to budget, and while we never took extravagant trips, being together as a family was all that was needed. In my opinion raising a respectful, loving human being is the most rewarding, fulfilling, hard, and scary commitment you could make. I have 5 wonderful and hopefully moralistic adult children. Your writing will suffice for a fantastic outlet, and I wish you much success and happiness!!

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    1. Thank you so much! I love hearing stories like yours! :)

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  16. Major decision there. You sound as if you're ready. Best of luck.

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    1. As ready as one can ever be, I guess. :)

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  17. Congratulations, Lara. You will never regret a decision made out of love. Lucky baby to have a mom who recognizes how important she is.

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    1. Thank you! What a nice way to put it--a decision made out of love :)

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  18. Whew! Big decision! I'm glad you'll were able to make it happen :D

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  19. Such a huge step, and what a wonderful thing! I'm glad you found what worked for you. I wouldn't trade staying home with my kids for anything. And later, when they're older, there's a time for another part of me.

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    1. That's what I figured as well--this time in her life doesn't last very long. My career will keep :)

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  20. I made the same decision 21 years ago and I've never regretted it. Good of you and Mister and Roo. Wishing you all much happiness!

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